Rediscovering me after three….
Let’s just say the last several years have been a whirlwind. After returning home from an overseas expat adventure, married a week later, baby boy born nine months after that and closely followed by two more within a blink of an eye, two house moves, and my eldest starting kindy I was worn out, I was tired, and I missed me.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and boys but something was missing. I had lost my mojo, that spark and my confidence. I’m not sure if my old friends noticed and if they did they never said anything and my new mummy friends had only known this side of me so I was the same to them but I felt I was in a rut.
I am someone with high expectations. I expect a lot from not only myself but those around me (sorry hubby). My brain feels a bit like Pinterest at times. I have pictures with everything I imagine my life would be like, what my family would dress like, the food we would eat and the holidays we would take. I grew up in a home featured in many a home and lifestyle magazine yet many of mine currently felt like a Pinterest fail meme. I was letting myself down.
I get asked on a daily basis, how do you do it with three young boys? And my current answer has been, with a healthy does of insanity, and some days that isn’t far from the truth. This year I was determined to be a little selfish, to take some more time for me, to find the parts of me I had given away to my husband and kids without even knowing. My energy and drive that was all used up tending to them and not leaving anything left to tend to me. I needed to get me back so I could be there for them the way I wanted to be. So I decided to make a change and it’s working, slowly but surely it is working.
STEP 1: My first step was to schedule time in the week just for me. I signed myself up for a weekly Pilates class giving me one night a week to escape the dinner, bath, bed routine and I got my hubby home from work a little early. This gave me something to look forward to. I LOVED it! Unfortunately the classes stopped but that is okay. Until I find a new class I’m happily enjoying a weekly walk around the bay run in the sunshine with girlfriends, gossip and hot take away coffee. It starts my week off on the right foot.
STEP 2: Book a girls weekend away. Only two weeks to go until I get to spend a weekend with eight of my oldest girlfriends from school sitting by the fire, drinking wine and catching up. What could be better.
STEP 3: Be creative. I’ve been doing more sewing. I’ve made a haven for myself by redecorating my bedroom in a sea of pink as an oasis to escape when I need a minute to myself…and it makes me smile.
STEP 4: Give back. You don’t know what is around the corner. I have a friend with a life altering brain injury who I visit weekly and help her with her lunch and keep her company for an hour or so. She doesn’t remember but for the time that I am there she is happy and that is all that matters.
STEP 5: Create new fun memories. To be honest my boys have me laughing on a daily basis. They are funny, smart, dirty, messy, active, noisy and sometimes naughty but we have fun. Going to the park, soccer, mummy dates over babycino’s or going to the grandparents to ride their kayaks, is all what being a kid is about.
I am still a work in progress and am now so much more than who I was when I started this journey and the best bit is now I have four of my favourite men to share it with.
