Anxiety…the amount varies from person to person dependent on the situation.
The first trimester of this pregnancy was an absolute whirlwind. The initial excitement and tears of joy when we found out I was already growing another human, was completely elating. A time of disbelief and happiness. From then on, I have found it a challenge to trust and enjoy the pregnancy, something only those closest to me have been aware of.
My anxieties started with our hurdles in falling pregnant. Not only did my body not ovulate but my uterine lining was thin, leaving the Dr’s to inform us the chance of miscarriage was higher than normal.
It is due to this and the fact I’m a Registered Nurse and Midwife, working in a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, caring for the most premature and unwell newborn babies (a job I love), that I have found it difficult to not expect it all to fall apart.
It wasn’t until I reached 24 weeks gestation that I took my first breath. The pregnancy was now viable. A huge milestone to reach. I also care for delicate 24 weekers and witness them grow and develop before going home generally healthy.
Most women don’t think about going in to labour or welcoming their newborn until at least 36 weeks…It therefore, will no doubt sound ridiculous that I was happy to reach a mere 24 weeks gestation.
I’m now full term and am starting to relax a little more each day. Every morning I wake up more grateful than the day before that my bub is a further 24 hours old. To wake up to my little one kicking and playing inside, reassuring me everything’s okay…heaven on earth!
So answer me this…comparable to fertility issues, miscarriage, stillbirth and antenatal/postnatal depression, is a high level of anxiety in pregnancy common? If so, is it also not widely discussed and why? How do we support each other in opening up and sharing experiences knowing there’s others out there with similar stories willing to support you?
As per QueenHood…surround yourself with a #dreamteamofwomen. Those you can trust. It took someone in my life to say to me ‘live your life how you want it to play out and deal with any hurdles at the time’ before I said yes to having a baby shower!!
Be brave!
Much love, Meg x
